Relax and Slim provides advice, clinics, therapy and consultancy on how to lose weight whilst keeping relaxed and stress free.

It does not matter if you are already on a diet, going to weight watchers, slimming world, arriba or any other slimming club, Relax and Slim will help you become more effective at losing weight.

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Diet Cheats Tricks
& Dodges

Love, Relationships & Rejection

As professional therapists we listen to our clients problems and try to uncover the real reason for their emotional eating problems. From our experiences we can put ‘feeling unloved’, ‘unwanted’ and ‘rejected’ at the top of the ‘most common’ list.

Obviously we are not a dating agency, however  we can offer advice and guidance on personal issues that influence relationship success and attracting potential partners. We also always temper advice given with practical realism to avoid unrealistic expectations and the inevitable disappointment and feelings of rejection and failure that brings.

The potential solutions are unique to each individual and often very personal in nature, so are normally only dealt with within the one-to-one session. However, we do offer some basic guidelines to help those that feel unready for more intensive therapy help.

This guideline help falls into two main types:

Existing Relationships

1. Communications - Failing to communicate remains one of the main reasons why existing relationships fail. Communication starts with talking, but includes non verbal communication, such as ‘love languages’ (see www.relationshipwise.co.uk for more information).
2. Change - People change, and common interests disappear through time so both parties start leading different lives. Critical times include children leaving home and retirement. Compromise is needed on both sides to establish new common interests, and time must be set aside to become involved in those interests.
3. Physical Issues - Age and health problems can put a strain on a relationship. One of the most significant of these is loss of libido. This is more than the inability to perform, this relates more to a total loss of desire for sexual relations. There are a number of medical conditions that could cause this, but www.relationshipwise.co.uk has a free ebook to help women with this problem. Pheromone perfumes (on right) have also been found to help overcome libido issues in existing relationships by creating a playful rekindling of desire.

Seeking a New Relationship

1. Incompatibility - Looking for a life partner, or someone for a meaningful relationship, requires time and effort, and more than a little bit of luck. As the saying goes “ you have to kiss a lot of frogs before…..” so understanding that the majority of people you meet, however attractive and interested in you, are unlikely to lead to relationship is important. Most relationships that fail in the first 6 months have the underlying problem of incompatibility, and two people desperate to make it work.
2. Unrealistic Expectations - It is easy to become fixated on a certain look, body type or personality, rejecting all others. This is often based on a past relationship or an ideal person based on a fictional media character. This may cause two problems, firstly you exclude many potential partners because you are seeking the mythical ‘perfect’ partner, or secondly you are destined to repeat past mistakes and possibly follow a trail of failed relationships.
3. Appearance - Meeting expectations. Remember the five second rule - if you look like a clown then people will think you are a clown, because they will in 5 seconds or less have summed you up and assumed from your appearance that you are a clown. When competition is high, for example at speed dating, then unless there is someone there actually looking for a clown, you don’t stand a chance (unless you cheat - see right).
   Checklist:
   ► Appearance - You visual appearance will the first thing you are judged on. Be aware of the dress code so you meet expectations.
   ► Smell - smell bypasses conscious thought so if you don’t smell right, or you smell too strong of perfume/cologne, or you are wearing the wrong scent, then a sub-conscious rejection will occur.
   ► Friendliness - People are attracted to friendly people, but repelled from people who are over friendly or look unfriendly. The right level of eye contact, smiling and positive body language creates interest and makes people feel comfortable in your presence.
   ► Vocal / Talk - The bit most people fear the most, yet rejection has normally happened long before you open your mouth. Getting this right takes practice and feedback from a listener, as you will need to know when to talk and when to be quiet, how to interrupt without appearing rude, how to modulate your vocal tone so people want to listen to you, and of course you need to know what to say.

When you are working with your therapist they will help you with all of the above on a personal and confidential level.

Relationship Cheats

We are not talking about the cad with two or three on the go at the same time.

This is something you can easily do to overcome the visual prejudice others may have of you.

Pheromone Perfumes & Colognes

If you use a pheromone perfume or cologne you are simply short circuiting the natural 5 second rejection rule by creating an irresistible sexual interest in you.

This give you a little more time to introduce yourself and get to know the person you want to talk to.

Formulas For Men

Alpha Maschio Bad Boy formula for men that love women.

Certo
Gives the wearer an air of trustworthiness, and disarming comfortableness.

Formulas For Women

 Alfa Donna
Bad Girl formula to be confident, daring, and very sexy.

Achar
For women who are looking for their knight in shining amour.